Kids Are Smarter Than They Look

"What the hell happened to Clifford? Did they get sued for racism and had to switch up the color?”

Synopsis:
       As I was working one morning on the book floor, an opportunity arose for me to dress up as a character for the stores infamous story time. Regrettably I had done so, and I can say this with complete honesty that I will never fucking do something so ridiculous ever again in my life. Kids are to damn smart.

Caution: The Beverage You’re About to Enjoy is Extremely Hot!

“What? 180 degrees? How can you serve that water? 90 degrees is boiling, that’s absurd!”

Synopsis:
       While working up in the cafe on a usual day, dealing with all sorts of assholes, a particular couple had walked up to me and requested two drinks. Yet when the man asked for his tea, he made it a point that I gave him the hottest water we had. After fulfilling his request, the man disregarded my warning of how hot the water is, and well you can guess what happened next...

An Honest Question From a Deeply Concerned Customer

"Are you guy's still in business?"

                            -Really lady? Would you be here, standing in front of me if we weren't?

Writing Update

Hey all, I haven't posted in a while because I've been busy finishing up my book, and getting some proposals ready to send out to a few publishers. Hopefully someone will want to run with the idea. I plan on putting up some more excerpts from stories in the next few days.

The Legacy of Yeah! Man

"What the hell is going on in this place?"

Synopsis:
       As I was working the cafe one day, I began to hear noises from the front of the store. It wasn't until later that I had found out that the yells I was hearing, were coming from a grown haggard looking man that screamed one word and one word only... and that was "YEAH!". This story describes my very first encounter with Yeah! Man capturing him in all of his glory.

Cheaters Always Get Caught

"Are you fucking cheating on me?"

Synopsis of Cheaters Always Get Caught:
          As I was covering a break up at the front registers, a tall business woman came up and wanted to return one of my company's expensive new e-readers she had gotten as a gift from her husband. After calling for a manager, and processing the return, the woman was shocked to find out that he not only bought her one, but apparently two others as well...

Phone Conversation

"Hello!"

Synopsis: 

      I was working the book floor, and as I was standing near a computer, my store phone rang. So I picked it up and customarily greeted the person calling, yet the man on the other line was completely out of his fucking mind, for he would only respond to the word "hello".